Hello gentle-people,
Today I bring you a collaboration post – but I decided not to cross posted in the way I would usually do for a collaboration. Instead of doing that, I decided to do this audio reading.
This post, "At Your Leisure": Moving at the Pace of Flourishing, is a part of the accommodation series for ’s Substack, . You can read along here:
Thank you to the welcoming folks over at Healing is My Special Interest who have become subscribers here and who have been leaving such encouraging comments! I am looking forward to engaging your responses to this peace.
I also want to thank my friends
, and who have accompanied my thoughts as I wrote this piece.🐦⬛ landing tracks
Consider pairing this reading with a somatic exercise. I read it yesterday to one of my best friends while she was taking a walk. Maybe take a walk, do some slow note taking or some deep breathing. Let yourself breath these words through places where your body is tight, expanding your range of motion only to what what comfortable or a healthy challenge for you.
Use the phrase “at your leisure” to invite a friend into a conversation that moves at the pace of flourishing. Note the places where urgency seeks to push you along and practice resistence in your breath or tapping your fingers slowly to help you wait for their response.
Start an new leisurely hobby, something you can pick up when you feel like it. Something that nourishes you and invites you to take your time or give it away.
“I have a love-hate relationship with deadlines—I would rather have living ones.”🫶🏻 thank you for sharing
Rose, I loved this essay so much. I read text so much better than I listen to audio, so I hopped over to DL Mayfield's Substack in order to read it, but I do love that you offered the audio as well. I know a lot of people who appreciate it, and that there are many for whom it's the only form they can consume.
I can relate so much to being a person who loves schedules and people almost equally... and who has feared being accused of being rigid or of micromanaging in the midst of trying to care for both myself and others.
I am finding ways now, to honor myself / my time / my ways of doing things in the midst of caring for others. I will have to adopt your transformation of position from "decline" into "recline."
I love your line, "I noticed that I can name these openings better when I have had time to sit with what would be most dignifying to my humanity." And this is such a gorgeous offering: "I am unavailable to do ____ but I would love to do ____ if invited." Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
I have also been thinking about labels--as in literally labelling more things around my house so I and others know where to put things back--and how *that* can be interpreted as rigid. And then I also come back to Brene Brown and her commentary on boundaries: clear is kind; unclear is unkind. I want to believe that the things I do to bring calm to myself are also an extension of kindness to others.
Finally, I wanted to mention that your post made me think of our wedding verse, Psalm 16:6. "The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance."
Thank you for sharing your words; I have deeply enjoyed reading them!